Roberts Hospitalized

John G. Roberts, Jr., Chief Justice of the U.S. Supreme Court, was hospitalized today after suffering a benign idiopathic seizure and falling at his summer home in Maine. Near as I can tell, “benign idiopathic seizure” is doctorspeak for “Probably not cancer, but we have have no fucking idea what it actually is.”

In any event, it looks as though Chief Justice Roberts is going to be just fine, which means the Court will go right on with the solemn business of paying lip service to precedent while simultaneously rendering it toothless.