Setting the Schadenfreude Record Straight

Bob Allen (R-Batshit Nuts), member of the Florida House of Representatives and co-chair of John McCain’s Florida campaign committee, still “vows to fight” the charge leveled against him of soliciting sex from an undercover police officer. A “family values” Republican offering to blow a cop is funny regardless of the details, but this story is even better than generally known.

As evidenced by the above link, even now the press is reporting that Rep. Allen “approached an undercover officer at a Titusville park men’s restroom and offered to perform a sex act for $20,” which strongly suggests that Allen offered to suck off the cop in exchange for the cop’s payment of twenty bucks.

Not so! In the arrest report, the cop states quite clearly that Allen “agreed that he would pay me $20 in order to perform a ‘blow job’ on me.” That’s right, The Honorable Mr. Allen offered to spit-shine the cop’s knob and pay the cop for the privilege.

No wonder the McCain campaign is having so much trouble meeting its fundraising goals.

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  • Sock Puppet  On August 2, 2007 at 10:32 am

    That’s why them hommaseckshuls is so unnervin’. They make it so a good, hot-blooded Amerukan can’t follow the danged pronouns.


  • […] Bob Allen (R-Gay) originally told the media that his arrest for offering to fellate what turned out to be an undercover police officer and pay the officer $20 was the result of a “huge mistake.” At the police station, though, he told a substantially different tale. Seems Rep. Allen was “intimidated” because the cop was a BIG BLACK BUCK and was only playing along to avoid becoming “a statistic”: “This was a pretty stocky black guy, and there was nothing but other black guys around in the park,” Allen, who is white, told police in a taped statement after his arrest. Allen said he feared he “was about to be a statistic” and would have said anything just to get away. […]

  • […] Orlando Sentinel story is available here. SCD’s prior entries are here, here and […]

  • […] Allen Wins One I should really leave this story alone, but I just can’t help […]

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